Don’t be a salmon
At least not all of the time.
"Transformation happens on the other side of surrender"
How often do you feel like you are going against the current, like a salmon swimming upstream? Hustling like hell to get to wherever it is we are going. Sometimes only to find, it is not what we were expecting.
Have there been times when you are exhausted from what feels like a constant uphill climb? Then we find the summit of the mountain - only to find yet another hill to climb!!! Challenge after challenge. Closed roads and detours at every twist and turn. Making our journey from A to B a whole heap of effort - WAY more effort than warranted…
Sound familiar? I know I have been guilty of working myself so hard in the battle to reach the summit, I haven’t noticed the scenery along the way to the ‘destination’. Often burning the candle at both ends and running on, or close to, an empty tank.
Only finding myself burning out, injuring myself, fatigued and often having the emotional intelligence of a 3 year old. Yup - adult tantrums, grasping for snacks and a sippy cup (read - wine cup) and my sleep grossly interrupted.
I would find myself wondering how I have managed to work myself to an empty tank… AGAIN. Didn’t I learn anything from last time?? The answer: abso-bloody-lutely not! I hear you ask - “why are you not learning from this and repeating the same thing…again and again?”
I am glad you asked. Firstly, your honour - I was so busy being busy, the whispers from my body - the internal warning system, was going unnoticed. The alarms would ring louder. My response to this was to dig my heels in and push harder, drowning out the ringing. Eventually, the ignorance of my alarm systems would lead to something along the lines of a torn meniscus, breaking a leg, repetitive bursitis, severe endometriosis - the list goes on really! The injury would somewhat heal and I would be back to the grind.
Ironically, teaching guided meditation about slowing down and listening to the body - which obviously to my own ears was translated to something that must have sounded like “blah, blah, blah”. Disclaimer - I TRULY believe in slowing down and listening to the body, I was so busy dishing the medicine out, I forgot to take a dose (or 2) myself!
The change for me needed to be dramatic. To shock me into some kind of ’new’ pattern. I needed this as I was so used to working a 50 hour week in the office, followed by 2-3 hours at home each night on another business, with my side hustle also gaining momentum and trekking all of the country to lead trainings - my Wonder Woman costume was fading - and fast.
Then that last straw was added and the proverbial camel’s back broke! (Note - no animals were harmed in the writing of this blog).
I typed up my resignation letter and handed it in. Then it was as if the next few weeks were choreographed by JLo herself. Before I knew it, I was meeting people that would prove to be very handy in the next few weeks. My leap of faith in taking on a lease to run my own yoga and wellness studio was suddenly real and happening. The to-do-list was gigantic, but the ease in which things happened was surprising and somewhat reassuring - trusting that I was exactly where I should be
Don’t get me wrong - I had to roll my sleeves up, get my hands very dirty and work my booty off: to open the doors to my first born (the studio - not an actual new born). There were a number of challenges on this road, but on the most part these were just small pebbles on the path. Unlike the uphill battle I was previously facing.
I was following a dream that had resided in my heart for some time. Bringing yoga to my pocket of the world. Spreading self love and peace in as many lives as possible. It was during this time I realised how much my stubbornness (shout out to all my fellow Taureans!) was keeping me on a path (corporate job) that was no longer serving me. Fighting a fight that was no longer my fight, all to prove what!?
The key take away from all of this - know when it is time to hustle and recognise when you need to stop and go with the flow. Surrender in to what is meant to be.
If you are anything like me, this means I need to spend extra time on my mat, to find the clarity and calmness within, so I can hear those alarms and feel with my gut. Allowing my natural instinct to rule - not a foggy mind.
The Lunar Eclipse Full Moon is bound to bring an intense energy to align us to our intended path. Be mindful of the messages that are being thrown at us - this may be the sign we are looking for.
Look within. Do the work. Find peace.
Ishvara Pranidhana - surrender the ego to attain our higher self.